- A 27 -year -old woman has explained the reasons why she thinks of the return of her ex -husband despite the long -standing problems and abuse
- Jacky told TUKO.co.ke that she met her husband in 2019 and moved to her within less than three weeks
- He explained that life was good at first, but after a few years he began to face emotional and physical abuse from him
- TUKO.co.ke also spoke to Nairobi psychologist Mary Okumu, who explained the possible reasons for a person to stay in a relationship or a abusive marriage
A Kenyan woman has shared the reasons why she thinks of the return of her ex -husband despite her abuse, which she described as emotionally and physically.
Source: Original
Jacky told TUKO.co.ke that he met James (not his real name) in 2019 when he worked at a serving at a restaurant in Mwea, Kirinyaga County.
“I finished form four but I couldn’t continue my college studies, so I was not able to make a living. He said.
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The young woman explained that things became increasingly difficult during the Covid-19 disaster and lost his job, although his relationship with James continued to thrive.
To Luckhe applied for another job as a clerk and was accepted, which made him financially strong enough to help his family as the first child.
Jacky thought eventually luck had come to his life as every aspect of his life seemed to go well.
“My boyfriend had qualities I never saw for my father. He had a strong, honest thought, had a real dream and he took care of me, ” He said.
According to Jacky, her husband planned to work, start a business, raise family and eventually bring her back to school.
He remembered that he went to live with him for less than three weeks after starting their relationship.
The 27 -year -old said life was good; They all went to work and returned home in the evening, and he could save money while also helping his mother and three sisters.
When did the problems start in Jacky’s marriage?
The two lived happily for a few years until 2023, when problems began.
Jacky explained that they were in conflict, and her husband left home and slept elsewhere.
He said he felt very hurt and decided to take revenge on sleeping outside, although he was actually on a one -week professional trip to Nairobi.
“I also told her I would sleep out to hurt her emotionally, but the fact was that I was on a professional trip to Nairobi,” He said.
When he returned, the young mother became very ill and went to the hospital, where she found out she was pregnant.
The incident caused friction, with James starting to doubt whether the baby really belongs to him.
“That’s where our problems started. He mentioned wanting to do a DNA test but he said he had no money. He also thinks I betray with our close friend, something he believes to this day,” Said Jacky.
Before pregnancy, James often blamed her for not having children and even insulting her. Jacky complained that despite the pressure of having children, her husband still doubts about the real father of their daughter.
Source: Original
What happened to Jacky after giving birth?
Marriage conflicts continued even after Jacky gave birth. He said that during the controversy, James would say the baby might not be his.
“I can’t blame her for what she is doing well; she takes care of the baby 100 percent, and our daughter has never missed anything. She said she would help me to raise the project I am living in her home, but she explains that if I go, she will cut help at all,” He said.
For the two, life became liable; They turned out to be just like tenants.
Jacky said that her husband had moved to an extra room that had been planned for their daughter and stopped sleeping with her in the same bed.
“He would come home drunk, look for something to fight, insult me, then go to his room, and the next day he claims he doesn’t remember anything,” He said.
The sad mother said she finally grew to be no longer emotional, since the conflict occurred every week and she was always the one who was blamed.
“He told me to cook breakfast every day, the house should be clean, and the dinner is ready when he returns to get things right. I tried, but sometimes he would come early, complain, and let’s argue,” He said.
Did the Kirinyaga woman leave her husband a rude?
Jacky said he had left her several times but returned because he was unemployed and wanted his son to grow up in a full family.
His limit came recently when the controversy intensified and turned into a publication.
“I have never had mental peace, but this journey turned into a completely physical abuse, and I still feel pain. He blames me for drinking every day, he says I don’t respect him, and I don’t listen. That’s why I left again,“He said.
He added that James knows he is coming back because of difficult situations at home, and has never told him to leave at all.
Is Jacky planning to return to her husband?
Despite the challenge, Jacky said his dream was still to raise his child in a full family, unlike the upbringing he received from one mother.
“I moved from living with my mother, aunt and grandmother. He said.
He said living with James would involve him fully dealing with their daughter’s upbringing, as difficult as a housewife.
According to Jacky, James was a good man when they met – respectful and caring. He believes his goodness can come back, and that is why he has not left him directly.
“Even when people advise me to leave him, I know he is a good person. People do not change immediately, and if I remain, it is because I know his goodness is still there,“He said.
He added that James still has a job to do to make their marriage succeed.
“If he gives me peace, he will find that peace in return. He cannot come home drunk, insult, beat me, and then say he does not remember anything,“He said.
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Why do people stay in torture marriages?
TUKO.co.ke spoke to Mary Okumu, a psychologist in Nairobi, who explained some of the reasons why people remain in poisonous marriages.
Okumu cited financial stability, saying that women look at the difficulty of raising children alone without a job or income, and thus choose to remain when they get help from a spouse.
He also added the upbringing and experience of childhood, which creates marriage practices.
“Some have seen their parents use force and have been thinking that is what is needed. Some have been raised believing that a woman should be controlled or beaten, and they consider it normal,” Said Okumu.
As for Jacky, Okumu said he seems to look for what he missed in his childhood, which is not naturally negative.
“The problems of the two are seen from the night as they lay aside, something that sowed the seed of doubt. Added Okumu.
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Source: TUKO.co.ke
